4. Leading Without the Mask

How Authenticity Inspires Courage in Others.

Let’s talk about masks.

Not the Halloween kind. Not the N95 kind. The kind you wear when you’re the boss and you’ve convinced yourself that being professional means being a slightly shinier version of a human being. The kind where you smile like you’ve slept. Speak like you’re certain. Pretend you’re not just Googling half your problems behind the scenes.

We’ve all done it.

We learn early that being “a leader” means you’re supposed to look calm, confident and utterly unfazed at all times. If something rattles you, you’re supposed to smile through it and throw around words like strategic alignment and synergies until people stop asking questions.

But here’s the thing.

Every time you wear that mask, you send a message.

It says, “This is how we do things here. We hide. We perform. We protect the brand at all costs - even if the cost is connection.”

That time I pretended I was fine when I absolutely wasn’t

I remember a stretch of time where I was under the pump. Business decisions, team tensions, cashflow gremlins - the usual leadership cocktail.

But I kept turning up looking… “fine.”

You know the face. That smooth, polished “All good team, let’s keep moving” expression. The one that says everything’s under control, even though your brain’s spinning like a dodgy washing machine on the final cycle.

A team member pulled me aside one day and said gently, “Are you OK? You’re smiling a bit hard.”

They weren’t asking because I looked weak. They were asking because I looked fake.

That was the day I realised the mask wasn’t helping anyone. Least of all me.

Being authentic doesn’t mean oversharing

Let’s be clear. Authenticity doesn’t mean turning every Monday stand-up into a therapy session. It’s not about sharing your deepest wounds with the finance team. It’s not about turning up in your dressing gown because “vulnerability.”

It’s about alignment.

Who you are. How you speak. What you stand for. How you lead.

It’s about being the same person in the boardroom as you are in the breakroom. The same person with clients as you are with your team. The same person on a good day as on a rough one - just with fewer snacks and slightly worse posture.

People can smell inauthenticity like burnt toast. It doesn’t matter how slick your strategy is. If your team senses that you’re performing rather than leading, they’ll stop trusting - or worse, they’ll start performing too.

Then the whole place turns into a workplace musical where everyone’s singing “I’m fine” while quietly Googling exit plans.

Dropping the mask gives others permission to drop theirs

This is the magic bit.

When you lead from your actual self - not your LinkedIn profile - something shifts in the room. People stop managing impressions. They stop competing for credibility. They start telling the truth.

When you say, “I’m not sure about this yet,” someone else gets brave enough to say, “Me neither.” When you say, “I’m nervous about the direction we’re heading,” someone says, “Thanks for saying that. I’ve been worried too.”

Authenticity builds courage - not just in you, but in everyone watching you and believe me, they are watching you.

But isn’t authenticity risky?

Of course. You might be judged. You might get misunderstood. You might look like a real person instead of a polished leader-bot.

But you know what’s riskier?

Creating a culture where people can’t be real. Where everyone’s performing leadership instead of practicing it. Where there’s no space for honesty, nuance, uncertainty or curiosity.

That’s not just uncomfortable. That’s dangerous. Especially in a world where things are changing every five minutes and leaders need their teams to think, not just comply.

Authenticity makes that kind of thinking possible.

What it looks like in real life

Authentic leaders don’t -

• Have perfect answers

• Hide their doubts

• Pretend things are great when they’re not

• Change their tone depending on who’s in the room

Authentic leaders do -

• Admit when something’s off

• Invite real feedback

• Ask for help

• Laugh at themselves when appropriate (and sometimes when not)

They make space. Not just for honesty, but for humanity.

That’s not soft. That’s strength.

What’s possible?

Imagine a team that doesn’t need to decode its leader. A workplace where people speak freely because no one’s busy pretending. A culture where the person at the top sets the tone by being open, real and willing to be seen.

Authenticity doesn’t just change how people feel. It changes how they perform.

Because when people stop wasting energy trying to look good, they start doing work that’s actually good.

So take off the mask.

You don’t need it. You never did.

Besides, your team is already suspicious.