3 - Why Communication Breaks Down (And What You Can Do About It)

If you’ve ever thought “I thought we’d sorted that,” you’re not alone. Here’s what’s really going on

You explain something. Everyone nods. You move on. Then two days later, the job’s gone off track and no one seems to know why. You’re left thinking, “Didn’t we just talk about this?”

This is the quiet grind of poor communication. Not big blow-ups, just small misfires that add up over time. In small to medium-sized businesses across Aotearoa, this sort of thing happens every day. Not because people are useless. Not because they’re lazy or trying to cause problems. It’s usually because something got lost between what was said, what was heard and what was actually done.

The problem is, most people don’t see these issues as communication problems. They blame the person, not the process. “He never listens.” “She’s always vague.” “They just don’t get it.” But often the real issue isn’t the person. It’s how the message landed.

What it looks like when communication goes sideways -

• The supplier sends the wrong part because your message said “urgent” but didn’t explain what made it urgent

• The team member misses the deadline because they thought someone else was on that part of the job

• The customer gets frustrated and leaves a sharp review after getting three different answers from three different people

• Someone in the team withdraws after a meeting because a comment landed badly and no one followed up

None of these are huge disasters. But together, they wear people down. They create rework. They stall progress and they turn good people into disengaged ones.

The cost of poor communication isn’t always visible on the balance sheet. But it’s there. In lost time, frayed tempers and avoidable stress.

Why this happens (even in good teams)

Let’s break down some of the most common causes.

1. We assume people know what we mean
You know what you’re thinking. You can picture what you want. But that picture doesn’t always make it out of your mouth. If you’re moving fast, you’ll likely give just enough for it to make sense to you. Trouble is, other people aren’t inside your head.

2. We rush and skip context
In busy workplaces, people fire off messages like, “Make sure this goes out today” or “Let’s change that layout.” But if no one says why, others don’t always understand what matters most. Context gives people the ability to make good decisions. Without it, they guess.

3. We all communicate differently
Some people are straight up. Others are more reserved. Some need time to process before responding. Others want to talk it out straight away. These differences aren’t bad but they can cause tension when people don’t realise what’s going on.

4. We avoid awkward conversations
If someone’s not pulling their weight or a plan isn’t working, we sometimes let it slide. We hope it’ll sort itself out. But silence usually makes things worse. People fill in the gaps with their own stories. That’s how resentment and confusion grow.

5. We overuse digital tools
Text, email and Slack are handy. But they strip away tone, expression and timing. A short message that feels efficient to you might sound blunt to someone else. That disconnect builds friction.

What to do instead

You don’t need to hold a communication workshop or write a policy. You just need to build a few simple habits.

1. Ask questions to check understanding
Instead of “We’re good?” try “What do you see as the next step from here?” or “How are you thinking of approaching it?” It shows respect and saves rework.

2. Share why something matters
Instead of “Make this change,” try “The client wants the update by Friday, so we’ll need to shift this around. Can you take care of it?” A bit of context helps people prioritise and respond better.

3. Choose the right channel for the message
Hard stuff or big-picture conversations deserve face time. Text is fine for updates. But if you’re giving feedback or raising a concern, do it in person if you can or pick up the phone.

4. Don’t let things fester
If something didn’t land well, check in. “Can I check how that meeting felt for you?” is a simple way to reopen the door. It shows you care and makes repair possible.

5. Clarify expectations
A big cause of tension is unclear roles. “Who’s responsible for what on this one?” should be a standard part of any job handover. No one wants to drop the ball. But they need to know which one they’re meant to be holding.

Real story from the floor

A small construction firm in the Bay of Plenty had a recurring issue. The team would finish a job, then get called back a few days later because something was missed. Turns out, the checklist for final inspections was stuck in one manager’s head. Everyone else assumed they were doing it right. After a five-minute team chat, they wrote the checklist on a whiteboard by the lunch table. Callbacks dropped by half in a month.

It wasn’t a skills issue. It wasn’t a motivation issue. It was a communication gap. Once it was spotted, it was fixed. No drama. Just clarity.

Final thought

Poor communication is rarely about bad intentions. Most people are trying their best. But without clear, respectful, consistent communication, even the best people end up frustrated. The good news is that it doesn’t take major change to turn things around. Just small shifts, repeated over time.

Start by noticing when something goes off track. Ask yourself, “Was the message clear?” “Did everyone know what mattered?” “Did I check that it landed properly?”

You’ll be amazed how many problems disappear when you get those things right.

In the next article, we’ll look at what you can do to build stronger relationships at work. Ones that make your days easier, not harder.

If you’d like a confidential, free of charge, free of obligation conversation about your business, here’s how to get me.

📞 Phone +64 275 665 682
✉️ Email john.luxton@regenerationhq.co.nz
🌐 Contact Form www.regenerationhq.co.nz/contact

If you’d like to read more RegenerationHQ thinking on SME business and other things, go here – www.regenerationhq.co.nz/articlesoverview

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